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15 Chuck Norris Facts

1. Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
2. Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
3. Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay’s potato chip.
4. Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
5. Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
6. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
7. Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.
8. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
9. Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
10. Chuck Norris doesn’t have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
11. Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse… horses are hung like Chuck Norris
12. Chuck Norris doesn’t play “hide-and-seek.” He plays “hide-and-pray-I-don’t-find-you.”
13. If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
14. There is no ‘ctrl’ button on Chuck Norris’s computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
15. Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.