Blonde Jokes Part 7

• What do you call a brunette between two blondes?
  An interpreter.
• How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
  Five. One to make the batter, four to peel the M&M’s
• How can you tell when a blonde has been using your computer?
  There’s white out on the screen.
• A smart blonde, dumb blonde and a ghost are on a treasure hunt. Who will find the treasure first?
  The dumb blonde – we all know there’s no such thing as smart blondes and a ghost.
• What do you call it when a blonde drives down the street with her head out the window?
  Refueling.

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Aristote – Descartes – Nietzsche – Lil Jon

Computer Science Quotes

• I do not fear computers. I fear lack of them. (Isaac Asimov)
• Never let a computer know you’re in a hurry
• Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy. – Joseph Campbell
• Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus. Computers are from hell.
• The computer was born to solve problems that did not exist before. – Bill Gates
• Computers have lots of memory but no imagination.
• Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. – John F. Kennedy
• Never trust a computer you can’t throw out a window. – Steve Wozniak
• Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. – Pablo Picasso
• A computer will do what you tell it to do, but that may be much different from what you had in mind – Joseph Weizenbaum
• We build our computer systems the way we build our cities: over time, without a plan, on top of ruins – Ellen Ullman
• A computer scientist is someone who fixes things that aren’t broken.
• Computers can never replace human stupidity
• The Internet: where men are men, women are men, and children are FBI agents.
• Software is a gas; it expands to fill its container. – Nathan Myhrvold
• If you think your users are idiots, only idiots will use it. – Linus Torvalds
• Programs must be written for people to read, and only incidentally for machines to execute. – Abelson and Sussman
• Programming is like sex, one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life. – Michael Sinz
• Before software should be reusable, it should be usable. – Ralph Johnson
• If you automate a mess, you get an automated mess. – Rod Michael

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Oh God Something smells like fish

I think it’s my vagina

Really?

I thought it was mine

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